Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Parenting in the era of smart phones.....

I guess I am a curious person. I observe behaviors and reactions in the general public.

I walked in to my local grocery store the other morning and there was an elderly lady sitting at the entrance. It was early in the morning and felt I should say, "good morning" I did.

Growing up,  my parents and my parents' peers seemed to always be asking us, " Did you greet so and so?" Yes, totally embarrassing us and forcing us to greet friends and strangers alike. We needed to be polite.

Fast forward to the era of smart phones. What do I see? Parents on their phones either talking or texting and their kids just walking behind them not able to speak because parents are otherwise distracted. Oh, and I have had children in my practice upset that mom or dad is " always on the phone"

But, in this new era. The era where we are apparently being trained to be none feeling, robots , unable to engage socially with others in real time. What happens?
There is no, " honey , did you say good morning to....?" While kids are off the hook, we are not properly socializing our kids, are we? 

I think something is lost. I feel that kids no longer know what to do socially in real-time. I hope we don't end up unable to speak and that we eventually will sit with others texting each other because we have lost our social/ verbal  skills.

We seriously need to budget our smart phone time. People have fallen and I imagine we are prey to thieves if we walk around staring at our phones. Parenting is a 24 hour, 7 day a week job. It's in the little things. It's talking to our kids as we see things, share about our lives at that age.
We need social relationships, we need for them to be in real-time.

Let's become more mindful of our online time. Kids need adults. They need relationships, and we are modeling "normal" behavior. All of us, even childless adults. Kids are watching.

Monday, February 13, 2017

Happy Valentine's Day y'all !

So some people will be happy tomorrow, some will pretend to be happy and then some will just go with the flow and enjoy a day of friendship regardless of relationship status.

St. Valentine's Day has become one of those capitalist days. A day to buy and spend money.
How much you spend on a friend, spouse or lover? ( hopefully you won't have to buy for all three)- oops, just inserting some inappropriate humor here.
Regardless of relationship status go have fun, eat some chocolate even if you have to buy it yourself. Heck, if you buy it yourself you know what you are getting.

Even NPR was on the" buy roses" kick. It was for a good reason, it was all donation based as they were fundraising but some people are very sensitive about this day. They feel they must have a date. But really? Just going out to be somewhat coupled can be yucky, unless you like the person. Besides, restaurants are packed, service staff is stressed and it can get pricey.

Happy Valentine's Day , go be with those who make you happy. That can be a spouse, lover, cat, dog or good platonic friend.  Relax.